Home > Uncategorized > More bad news for Carcosan PCs

More bad news for Carcosan PCs

January 26, 2012 Leave a comment Go to comments

Not only are drunken priests all up in our labs breakin’ shit and melting our faces off, not only are we sacrificial foie gras for alien spoonbenders and jellies, now it turns out we’re also the latest decorative fashion.

Right after the dimensional gates* opened and some pioneering Carcosans got themselves into Renaissance Europe, and those crazy Europeans got themselves their first look at our sweet Jale and Ulfire and Dolm men, you better believe they wanted pigments in those colours, for making pictures of demons to scare their god-men into line (go figure – always with the demons, amirite?). And guess what? Turns out if you render a Carcosan down into their essential salts, that’s exactly what you get – jale and ulfire and dolm powder – and those European painters are mixing that up with egg yolk and oil and frescoing it all over their churches or baptisteries or hymnals or hourbooks or what-all shit. And most of the time if you try to undo the ritual and bring back your buddies you get onlie the liveliest awfullness because the painter’s cut the pigment with who knows what else and most of it’s back in his studio or it’s been hawked to some other client or somebody snorted it because they thought it was goddamn ulfire lotus powder or something.

Brothers and sisters, this has got to stop. First we need once and for all to root out the sorcerers and stop selling each other as sacrifice ingredients – it’s not cool, and it just leads to everyone losing their kids and resenting each other. Then we need to unite against this new threat, and not sell each other out to paint suppliers and doll manufacturers (cuz you just know what’s gonna happen when Mattel get to hear about this). We are men! Not art materials!

* whale flails, nails frail sail, prevails, bails. Can this possibly be completely unrelated?

  1. January 26, 2012 at 12:45 pm


  2. January 26, 2012 at 12:58 pm

    Solidarity is what the polychromatic Carcosans need, for sure.

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